The Mords

One would say they looked like the unlikely combination of a slug and a rhinoceros, if two such animals existed.  One would also have reason to think them dumb grumps.  This is a common misconception.  Mords are, in actuality, just about the smartest, friendliest, most chivalrous large-herd-animals you are likely to meet.  They are just terribly slow, which sometimes comes off the wrong way.

For example, if you were to inquire of a Mord concerning his position on, say, affirmative action, you would probably be met with an eyebrowless glare (judging glares without brows is tricky business).  But what you would likely not know is that roughly two and a half weeks later, said Mord would utter a brilliant dissertation on the subject, with no one present to hear.

It is said that Prince Gesundheit got his name when King Fatpan and Queen Leafnut, unable to come up with a mutually satisfactory moniker, vowed to go with the very next suggestion they heard.  How were they to know that the Mord whom they asked was not answering their query, but responding to his nephew’s sneeze from three weeks prior?

A fortnight after the Prince’s christening the same Mord, when asked about his stance on global warming, was heard saying “Mortimor Von Belt-Whip!”